No Lap Bar

Its a song.

Listen here

yeah… yeah… used to love rollercoasters as a kid

now I’m lookin’ for the safety inspection papers…

Used to throw my hands up high when the track took dips

Now I grip my own wrists when the mood shit flips

Click-click-climb, stomach tight, here we go again

Fake smiles at the gate like “admit one friend”

Everybody loves the rise, nobody talks brakes

Nobody talks neck strain, blackouts, heart shakes

Nobody says adulthood kills amusement parks

When you realize every thrill leaves electrical marks

You call it passion, I call it altitude abuse

Yankin’ my nervous system around till the screws come loose

One minute “baby, you’re magic,” next minute radio silence

Now I’m shadowboxing ghosts in emotional violence

And the drop comes quick… like GODDAMN

No warning lights No harness click Just— gravity pickin’ favorites again

Rollercoasters ain’t fun when you’re grown now

No lap bar holdin’ me down now

Everybody screamin’ like the fear’s the best part

I just wanna know when the whole ride falls apart

Up-down jerk-stop heart lock rail rot

You call this love? This feels like whiplash in a parking lot

I can smell the grease and the rust in the rain

Hear the old ride operator mispronounce my pain

“Keep your arms inside the vehicle please” Meanwhile my soul got dragged thirty feet through the trees

And I’m tired… SO tired… Of emotional elevation changes One day sunshine Next day vacant faces

I don’t even like heights but I climb in still

Like maybe THIS ride won’t try to kill What little bit of peace I finally built But the safety bar’s gone and the floorboards tilt

Everybody says: “LET GO” “LIVE A LITTLE” “LOVE’S A RISK”

Yeah? So’s head trauma.

Rollercoasters ain’t magic when the bolts come loose

When your chest learns fear from somebody you choose

Round and round and around I go Still payin’ full price for another low blow

No lap bar No ground Just another pretty light breakin’ down…